It’s me again, here to tell you that I’ve been good, though I’m curious. How do you keep track of all the people making that claim? It’s got to be hard knowing whose being honest, right? Stretching the truth seems to be all the rage lately – you know, fake news and all that. It’s an epidemic. Not only do you have to tell the naughty from nice, but you also have to sort out who’s being honest and who’s slinging the reindeer poop. Tough gig. In a way, your job is similar to that of the Special Prosecutor, who seems to be wading through a pile of poop himself. But as far as I can tell, his poop-ometer is spot on, and he seems to be figuring it all out, as I’m sure you will too. Good luck with that.
Anyway, no poop-slinging here, I tell it like it is. Sure, I exaggerate from time to time, but never on things that matter, just little things like, how big the fish was or boat lengths from the mark. So you can take to the bank that I was good this year. I was kind, worked hard, had no ‘me-too’ moments, was (usually) nice to my wife, didn’t beat up anyone (not that I could), wasn’t indicted (or even charged), my kids don’t hate me, I paid my bills, gave a little something to charity, tried not to foul people on the starting line – all and all, a decent year. In the interest of full disclosure, I did honk at a few people on my commute, maybe even used expletives (though never with the windows down). But commuting makes me crazy. It’s not the aggressive people who weave in and out and cut you off – I can relate to them. But the guys sitting at green lights with their faces in their phones – that gives me fits. My blood pressure goes up just thinking about it, but I digress.
So here is my Christmas list:
- Please get a case of beer for Jim Taylor, or as I like to call him, El Jefe. He’s beginning his second year at the helm of Fleet 5, which is one of those gigs that doesn’t look like a big deal until you do it. But Jim makes it look easy, all with a quick smile and occasional quip (often about my hiking).
- I’m not sure what to get the rest of Fleet leadership, which as you know includes Joe Fava, Jeff Shoreman, Dave Reynolds, Elise Nash, Nat Taylor and Peter Sorlien. Those guys kicked butt. Maybe just a nice thank you. Worth mentioning is that Jeff, Dave and Elise all did their thing despite not sailing much (something about young families). Oh, and I hear that Larry Ehrhardt is taking over as social chair, which is a big deal, so please drop him something too – maybe an elf to help with the bar.
- We need presents for our party hosts Christina Pandapas, Rebecca & Larry Ehrhardt, Jennifer & Steve Uhl, Vonda & Jim Raisides and Wendy & Peter Frisch. How about gift certificates for maid service?
- Speaking of parties, you may have heard that the Fleet 5 Winter party will be at my house again (Saturday Jan 5th at 6:30). Please, arrange for there to be no snow storm that day. Also, let everyone know that if the Patriots are playing, the game will be on.
- Could you drop off drink tickets for all the RC volunteers? There are way too many to name, but certainly don’t forget Susie Schneider, Rick Hamill, Ken & Judy Adam, the Whipple brothers, the Dieselmans and Joe Guglielmo. And how about a little something for the MRA volunteers and the three clubs who sponsor them?
- Oh, and while I’m at it, Tomas Hornos put on a great clinic last summer. What do you suggest for him? How about another boat, as he only has 4-5 of those.
- Okay, I lied. Now that I think about it, I do want one thing for myself. Please make sure my friend Pete comes to the winter party (which again is on Saturday Jan 5th at 6:30).
- Santa, I hear the town is planning upgrades to Parkers this summer. That’s awesome, but I worry about the impact on sailors. Please make sure that project doesn’t keep one-design sailors from dry sailing there this season.
- Jocelyn Cook’s mast is straighter than a Townie and could use some rake. Please get her a longer headstay, and possibly help her move her mast step forward.
- I can’t say enough about Dave Nelson, who put on a clinic at last year’s RW. Please thank him for the sailing lessons, and also for the present he gave Christina and me by not showing up much for MRA. Maybe also arrange for small work emergencies for him during Race Week and the 2019 Hingham Nationals (Aug 22nd-24th).
- I’ve asked in the past that you find Steve Uhl a regular crew, but now I‘m starting to think he doesn’t want one, so don’t worry about it.
- I know I’ve been asking this for years, but please make 2019 the year the Bloxhams finally make it back to our starting line. Honestly, six years to fix up a boat? Seamus’s boat builder would have done it faster. Maybe you could loan him some helpers.
- I’m so appreciative of Mike Lane helping me hone my starting skills. Honestly, rarely a start goes by that he’s not blocking or tailgating or taking me up. Must be some kind of fatal attraction, but that guy sticks to me like glue, which really helped me up my game. So please thank him, and maybe suggest he consider helping someone else next year.
- Finally, you may recall that my friend Elise mentioned last year that she was running out of excuses, and I asked you to drop off a few. Wow! You really nailed that one!
Thanks Santa. Fly safely. And don’t forget, the party is at my house on January 5th. First gun is in about five months. Happy holidays. -k